every day
every day it gets a little easier to make it through the day but i still have those moments of lucidity where i remember that she's gone, and it hits hard when it comes. i'm okay when i'm with people, friends, at school and work when others are around. when i'm by myself there's no guarantee. thursday i was in receiving with julie and was fine, quiet, but not crying and not tearing up, until she went on break. i was back there by myself for all of fifteen minutes and probably didn't make it four before i burst into tears. today no bursts, just melancholy and heavy heart; watery eyes a little. it will hurt like fucking hell again when i get the call that she's 'ready' to take home.
just trying to keep myself busy in the meantime.
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thepartyline) wrote,
