saucepans & the single girl (![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} thepartyline) wrote,@ 2008-04-16 12:45:00 |
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| Entry tags: | i miss my dog, molly |
up and down; and Thank You to everyone
Last night was hard. I took a nap from 1.30-5.30, then hung around the house for a bit with Frankie, called my mom to cry, and went to Petco to get food, a new toy, and biscuits for Frankie. I stopped at Sleven and got myself a disgustingly rich chili cheese dog (Molly would approve?) with a little bit of everything on it. Came home and played with F, called my grandma and cried, called my aunt and cried, and called my mom and cried, while trying to clean up my living room (I actually did get a little bit done). I wrote my stupid final paper for comp and completely bs'ed the whole thing. Tried to go to bed around midnight but it didn't work so I called my mom again and cried. Finally fell asleep close to 1, then woke up at 7 to go feed the ponies. I contemplated going to Bio but didn't. Needed more sleep. So back home I came, went back to sleep, curled up with Frankie. Had a dream where Molly was at my house and I could hear her breathing but I couldn't find her. There was one Frankie in every room but no Molly. I finally found her under my bed and when I said "There you are!" and crawled under to get her, I woke up. It was 9.30am, exactly 24 hours since she went "home." I sobbed for the next half hour, all through my shower and getting ready for school. I feel like I will be looking for her everywhere for the rest of my life. Even yesterday when I was leaving the clinic there was a doggy out back who looked like her when she was young and spry, and that made me cry. I tried to call mom but the bill wasn't paid so the phones were shut off. Once I got here to campus I emailed her about it and she paid to get them turned back on and called me.
I decided I'm going that when I get her ashes I'm going to get a flower and put it in a big big container (so that I can move it with me, as I've established no permanence anywhere) and buy her ashes tin in there underneath it. I found this rose called Our Molly which I love, but it's a UK strain and I don't know if I can get it over here. Mom suggested calling the Detroit Rose Society, so I'll see if there's anyway to get one here. Alternately there is a viola called Irish Molly that I love (that site is out of them but I found a few more that have them). I like the colours of it, they are very Molly-in-summerish, plus there is a viola called Rebecca that I can accent it with.
I really appreciate everyone's extremely kind words and thoughts. It means so much to me that you are all so caring and loving of this doggy you never met. A few people said they would like to donate some dollars to the cost of having her ashes returned to me, and I really appreciate the thought as well. I would never have thought to ask you all for that but if you'd like to, it would be lovely. The cost ended up being $164.30 (I think Dr. Smaller negotiated it a little for me). Please don't feel like you are obligated to or that I'm trying to gouge money out of anyone. If you would like to donate please don't donate more money than you can. If more than the $164.30 is received I will donate the rest in her name to the Michigan Humane Society - Detroit chapter, which is where we got Molly in 1993, where her vets (Dr. Smaller, Dr. Amy and Dr. Cici) were, where she had her surgery in 2005, and where she went "home" yesterday. (If you donate anything please enclose an address so I can send you a thank you note, because it really does mean everything in the world to me that you are so willing to help me take her home). So. here's a button (if it works)
or you can paypal bexbex@gmail.com.
Molly in Ohio (around my bday?)
Molly in the grass (every spring/summer when the lawn grass started to get really full and lush, the first thing she would do would be to plop down and roll back and forth in the grass... it was always the real beginning of warmtimes for me when she did this...)
almost always smiling
Molly at Thanksgiving time after we came back from Ohio
Miss Molly Jane Bat Ears
Molly was Frankie's favourite dog ever... he doted on her, when we went to ohio and when she stayed with us when Mom went to SC
Molly hiding... she always liked to find "holes" to snuggle up in.
I will do some memories later, when I can.
